Finals

I have had a pretty frustrating few weeks. Especially on Friday when yet again I am too rich to be poor. Even without having a job. I feel very frustrated and lost on what to do. It is not right I am the one struggling but unfortunately this has been the way it is.

I realized this week I only have two weeks left of this semester and it caused a slight panic attack. I at first was unsure why but then when I thought about it that means I am that much closer to having this baby. This is not just finals for school but final month of pregnancy as well. And without knowing how in the world I am going to pay for daycare for the next year and half I am almost dreading the final days of this semester.

It makes me feel more depressed and more unmotivated to get things done which should be the opposite! I found myself pushing myself to get anything done today and it's only 4 o'clock and I am exhausted. I feel like I should have accomplished way more for being home all day which hasn't happened in a very long time.I have met so much opposition and I have been pushing through it as hard as I could.

I am not intending for this blog to be a woe is me but I am expressing the frustrations I am feeling. Do I want pity? Maybe a little. Do I deserve pity? No. I think that is what upsets me the most is I got myself into this situation and the more I try and dig myself out the more it seems there is no way to fix things or make it better.

Perhaps a nap is all I need.